A Collection of Tweets

I recently hopped on the Tweeter bandwagon, and one of the parts I am enjoying most is some of the genuinely funny "Tweets". Thought in this post I'd share a few;

From Jack Nicholson:
'Life is NOT like a box of chocolates, it's more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow.'

From Steve Jobs: 

"I'm not sure what's worse: Being placed on the back of the "TIME 100" cover or being pictured next to Sarah Palin."

From Steve Jobs again: 
"Starting this summer, porn will be blocked from all Mac browsers. If you want smut, use Windows."

From Bruce Willis:
"Shit; trapped in office building with terrorists and ex wife."

From John Cleese:
"Yes, I know, I'm supposed to Twitter every day. But I'm too busy having my teeth stuck back in."

From Ra McGuire:
"INXS's "New Sensation" is now a Kraft salad dressing commercial. So, the Raise a Little Hell cracker thing isn't quite so embarrassing"

Thanks for the laughs everyone!  

Ending Poverty and Disease is Possible

Here's the theory.....

First, I think that it's safe to assume that the combined military might of the G8 countries ( France, Germany, Italy, Japan, the United Kingdom, the United States, Canada, and  Russia) is sufficient to handle any threat we may face in the foreseeable future. Add in the Outreach Five Nations ( Brazil, China, India, Mexico, and South Africa) and the remaining threats are miniscule by comparison.

Okay, so let's look at their military budgets (2008 figures, Stockholm International Peace Research Institute, all expressed in US Dollars):

United States -           $548,531,000,000.00
United Kingdom -       $57,392,000,000.00
Germany -                   $37,237,000,000.00
Italy -                           $32,103,000,000.00
Japan -                         $42,751,000,000.00
Canada -                      $15,940,000,000.00
China -                        $63,643,000,000.00
Brazil -                        $15,477,000,000.00
India -                          $24,716,000,000.00
Mexico -                        $3,938,000,000.00
South Africa -               $3,953,000,000.00

TOTAL:                    $845,681,000,000.00

Over $845 Trillion Dollars. Wow. With stockpiles of armaments capable of extinguishing life from the planet a thousand times over please explain the necessity? The Military-Industrial Complex of course.

So let's imagine that the G8+5 decided they could do something better with their money. Let's say they all agreed to cut military spending in half and utilize the other half, $422.5 Trillion Dollars, to end Poverty and eradicate curable disease throughout the world.

Not just for one year, let's make it a ten year commitment. Think of what that money can do. Consider the implications on a Worldwide scale. The Job Creation, the Investment, the Infrastructure. Think of the impact on humanity. Think of the worldwide perception of the member countries.

The United States maintains it's World supremacy through military might (and with continued spending of $275,000,000,000.00 annually it still would). It is an antiquated way of thinking. It's necessity has come and gone. This would be an opportunity to show the good that can come of power.  By joining with the other member nations in this mission, what country would challenge their combined power.

I don't believe I'm saying anything new. I haven't formulated the Divine Plan. It's been said a million times and justified a million ways. It falls on deaf ears. We need to change our collective way of thinking. We have the capacity and capability to make our world a better place - not just for the select few - for everyone.

One of my favorite songs, "Dear Mr. President" by Pink, really sums it up. Although it was written as a direct jab at George W. Bush, it's lyrics could apply to every President of every industrialized nation. Get past the bohemian stigma associated with the artist and listen to the lyrics. Watch the video.

Dear Mr. President, you can change the world.....

After Bed-Time

Parents will agree, there is that time of day that we relish when the kids are tucked in. For that brief time before we too must sleep that we share as adults we are thankful. Often I think that were it not for this brief respite from work and parenting we would all go stark-raving-mad. I so look forward to this time with my wife. Glass of wine. Adult conversation. Time to be ourselves. Time to be a couple - a concept so lost at times in the insanity that is family life in the 21st century. And like every couple, it has been lost on us before.

This is a brief post, my wife just returning from night-school, and the kids tucked in. Couple time. Cheers!

One of Those Days.....

Long day at the office. A forty minute commuter train ride turned into two hours because a tree up-ended in a windstorm and fell across the tracks. My wife had night-school and couldn't hang around to pick me up so I had to walk. In the rain. Get home to the kids who immediately inform me that they're starved and cry in unison "When's dinner?". Don the chefs hat and get cooking. Damned fine job too if I do say so myself. However, the kids didn't seem to think so. They picked at their food with their forks. My daughter obsessing about the bones that may possibly have been missed in the fish, my son, well, he just likes to pick. They were still assessing the palatability when I finished mine and started unloading the dishwasher. Every time I turned my back one would poke the other. Then the one who was the victim of the poke would fink to me. Food's cold now. Tension is rising. My son makes a show of a mouthful to prove his progress. He has to open his mouth to show me. Food falls to the floor. Daddy's BP is now 150 over 110 and rising. Warmth in my cheeks. My daughter sees the impending explosion, downs the remaining three mouthfuls in one and makes a dash. In the words of "The Champ", "I lose it!". I yell. My mouth opens and it streams like an MP3. My son eats. Finish cleaning. Get them ready for bed. My son informs me that he doesn't like me anymore. I'm done. I ask my daughter to read him his story. She informs me that she doesn't want to read the "Damned Story".

I come downstairs, open this computer and vent. Part of the reason I do this is for the kids. Someday I want them to read this and know how hard parenting can be. Best thing is knowing that someday they'll have kids and history will repeat and only then will they understand. Last laugh?

Now that I'm back to 120 over 80, I'll go tuck 'em in. Tomorrow's another day. Goodnight.

Rain, Rain, GO AWAY. Please.....

It is amazing what you notice when you pay attention.

It's raining today in Vancouver. I know, what a surprise! But contrary to Torontonian beliefs it rains less then one might think - especially this year. Snows less too - much to VANOC's despair.

There is a mood swing in the city when it rains, especially when we consult our trusty forecast (Kidding) and see that it will rain for several days. People move slower. Smiles Invert. The virtue of Patience is out the window. Lively conversation on the train into the city is replaced by quiet tension, and glares to those who break it.

The difference is huge, but goes unnoticed because nearly everyone is in the same funk. Vitamin D? After the doldrums of winter, the rain brings with it a melancholy that only more sun can remedy.

Funny thing is, if you listen to the exuberant conversations amongst the same group of suntanned train passengers in late July you'll hear comments like "I wish it would rain", or "We need some rain", or "It's too damned hot!"

Cheer up Vancouver, Summer is nearly here!

Play Ball

My blogging was interrupted this weekend. My eleven year old daughter had a softball tournament which became my sole responsibility while my wife entertained our out of town guest and our five year old son. We lovingly call it "Divide and Conquer".

The tournament was a blast. I'm the type of Dad who dons a glove during practice, boisterously cheers the team, provides moral support, and bites his tongue when the umpires make blatantly bad calls. I am up on my feet ninety percent of the time. I know all the girls by name. I'm at the dugout to high-five them when they come off the field, whether the inning was exceptional or dismal. I enjoy the game.

I find it interesting to watch the dynamics, not just of the team, but also the parents. The passive. The aggressive. The social. The anti-social. Those who want to be there, and those who would rather be somewhere else. Some who watch every play, others who read a book or talk on their phone the entire time. The ones we never meet who send the kids with another parent, and those who drop the kids at the field and pick them up at the end of the game. For some it seems a struggle to get out from behind the wheel.

If you pay close attention you can see character traits of the parents in the kids and it lends insight into what their future might hold and the people they will become. Smiling kids. Laughing kids. Quiet kids. Nervous kids. Whiny kids. Crying kids. Cowering kids. Chips off the old blocks.

Our girls played hard and played well. Seeing their smiles when they round home and head for the dugout is heartwarming, and for some perhaps as good as it gets.

They didn't win every game but they shared the experience. That is the most important thing.

The Inevitable Demise of The Hudson's Bay Company (HBC)

The world's longest continually operating company (since 1670), the Hudson's Bay Company is in dire straights financially due to decades of disorganized mismanagement. Sold off to American interests earlier this decade, then flipped to another American company (Lord & Taylor) about two years ago, the floundering company has failed to address the changing market and the desires of the consumer.

Signaled by the demise of Woodward's and Eaton's, Canada's other retail giants, the consumers shopping habits have changed and Canadian big-box retail has failed to change with them. Customers don't want to shop in a box. They seek variety and dynamic visual appeal. They are turned off by "Bay Day's" and the perpetual tacky sales, markdowns, and Clearance racks. More recently they are turned off by the plethora of radio advertising featuring the manly baritone vocal stylings of company President Bonnie Brooks who is trying desperately to revive and revitalize the asphyxiated company.

The Hudson's Bay Company will always exist as a part of Canadian heritage. Our children, and their children, will study it's history. Soon, history may be all that is left, and the last of the "Canadian" big three will fall.

US Exploits Toyota Woes

Toyota has been exporting automobiles to North America for decades. Their vehicles have long been favored by people who appreciate economy, reliability, and style.

Though data is sketchy, what I found seems consistent with Toyota being the World's top-selling brand. And for good reason. The safety and reliability ratings and economy, coupled with extremely high customer satisfaction ratings and loyalty, make them highly desirable.

Toyota started making economical vehicles long before economy was an issue. Back when gas was cheap and we thought we'd never run out. Back when we all thought the Ozone layer was the dense smoke in a bar after 11:00 o'clock. Consider how much worse the Ozone layer would be if all those Toyota customers had instead opted for gas guzzling American cars for the last 40 years.

So now, much to their despair, Toyota has had a wrinkle in their manufacturing that has resulted in recalls, halted sales, and left a question mark in the mind of many about safety. Toyota handled the situation quickly and in light of the scale of the problem, efficiently. (BP take a lesson) The deficiencies have been identified, technicians deployed, and suspect vehicles are being inspected and / or repaired at a record pace. Toyota values their safety rating. It is a source of pride for the company and it's employees around the world.

Timing is everything. All of this happens when the world economy is bottoming out. New vehicle sales are way down. The American government is dumping billions of dollars into their faltering automakers just to keep them afloat. What better way to deflect attention than to attack a very successful foreign competitor, and attack they did. Congressional hearings, inquiries, massive fines, and unprecedented news coverage. You can just hear the backroom chatter. "We have to attack. They have vehicles of mass destruction!"

It would be very, very telling to see data on the count of vehicle recalls by manufacturer over the last 30 years, and to assess how many American manufactured recalls posed serious safety risks to drivers and passengers but were never brought to light in the media.

The spin doctors of the US and the politicians and lobbyist's who motivate them, along with the Media have indeed put up a wonderful smokescreen, effectively drawing attention away from their homegrown disasters.

Toyota has been attacked, but in the end will have the last laugh. They still build better cars.

Drill Sarah Drill: The Palin Plague Sweeps the Gulf

Sarah Palin. Sweet Soccer Mom. (Insert: Wink) Big Game Hunter. Beauty queen (ancient history).

Tell me how? How can any American fathom putting Sarah Palin in office? Do they not listen to her? Did they not see the Katie Couric interview?

DRILL BABY, DRILL! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rn2Tyh6b5dE&feature=fvsr

Remember? But will Americans remember during the next election if Palin actually has the audacity to run? Remember the pained looks on John McCain's face when she spoke. Could you not read his mind - "What the hell have I got myself into?" or "You've got to be kidding". Had the Republican Party selected a competent running mate they would very likely have taken office.

Sarah Palin effectively dragged the party down. The staunch Republican's were laughed at worldwide. Sarah Palin did that. The amazing thing is the short-term memory exhibited by Americans.

Over 200000 gallons of oil is leaking daily in the Gulf. It is a disaster of epic proportions. The economy of the Gulf Coast is in shambles. The ecological implications are huge. Where is Sarah (DRILL BABY, DRILL) Palin now? In hiding no doubt. Out of the public eye. A gag order from her advisers. Political suicide to open her mouth until this is over, or at least until CNN latches onto a story that she can tag into with a subject far removed. Imagine what Kate Couric could do with her now.

REMEMBER!

Twist and Shout

Welcome to Twisted, a Social Commentary by Kevin James Day. My opportunity to share my thoughts on things I see around me. Things I do. Things I experience. Things I love. Things I don't. Things that piss me off!

Vancouver is the center of my universe. I know Torontonians truly believe they are at the center of every Canadians universe, but alas, WRONG. I've lived there. Mars at best. Still a bit behind on the Social Evolutionary scale. Every visitor to Vancouver comments on our social graces. "Everyone is so nice", we hear them say. Torontonians are so busy being busy that they forget to be nice. Not to mention the bigoted undertones that still prevail.

"But you have too much rain", they would counter. And yes, we would at times agree, but when our skies are clear they are still blue not brown. Our rain cleanses. Our mountains are rock not concrete. We have an ocean, not a lake. We pause to smell the roses. They smell exhaust.

Most importantly, Vancouverites believe that Vancouver is the center of their universe, but are not arrogant enough to believe it's the center of every Canadian's. That is the fundamental difference.